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By Webmaster, 10 September, 2013

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Disclaimer: The views expressed on this web site are quantum superpositions, and may or may not be the opinion of the author, depending on how you observe them. If your view differs from that of the author, the author's view will be deemed to be the correct version. Please do not attempt to alter the author's mind if your reality has collapsed. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle. For off-road use only. No user-serviceable parts inside. Avoid contact with skin. May irritate. Pregnant women, the elderly, sufferers of serious medical conditions, those who are sleep deprived or under the influence of alcohol should avoid utilizing the 3D functionality. Batteries not included. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Not dishwasher safe. Not to be used for navigation. Viewer discretion advised. Closed airspace. Professional pilot. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. May cause drowsiness. Edited for television. Pre-recorded for this time zone. No purchase necessary. Use only in well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flame. Trademarks appear for identification purposes only. Be prepared for sudden gusty cross winds. This is the fine print. This supersedes all previous notices. Why are you still reading this?